


The Magical Fucking Hammer

by Miss_Psychotic



Category: Thor (2011)
Genre: Crack, I Don't Even Know, M/M, Masturbation, Object Sex, Other, improper use of mjolnir, secuded by a magical hammer, voyerism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-08
Updated: 2012-07-08
Packaged: 2017-11-09 10:14:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,633
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/454346
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Miss_Psychotic/pseuds/Miss_Psychotic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Loki gets seduced by a magical fucking hammer. enough said.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Magical Fucking Hammer

**Author's Note:**

> i don't even. i have no idea okay?  
> this just happened in my head and for some reason i though "Oh lets make this a fic"  
> I'm sorry, really I am.  
> CRACK  
> not real, didn't happen, blah blah usual disclaimer.

Loki was a creature of very little patience.

Very little indeed.

But what he lacked in some things he made up for in others, magic, for one.

Magic was in his very heart and soul and it manifested itself in many different ways.

Sometimes if left alone in a room with Mjolnir he could feel the hum of life and magic radiating from the hammer.

Sometimes he felt more but he was sure it was a trick, some kind of mix up with his own feelings towards the hammers master.

One afternoon while studying and waiting in Thor's chambers for his not-brother to return from a meeting with his father, Loki slammed down his hand and douses the small flame he had been building up as he glared at Mjolnir.

"What do you want of me?" he growled.

The hammer hummed at him.

"How rude and so very forward of you," he hissed, perplexed by this.

"Will you reframe from humming such filth at me, I'm sure your master will return and offer you some affection" Loki huffed trying to concentrate.

But Mjolnir wouldn't let up.

The hammer hummed again, planting images of a wanton Loki riding Thor, head thrown back in pleasure, throat exposed.

Loki let out a low growl.

"Stop it!" he snapped.

The image changed to Mjolnir sitting still in the middle of the room metal head on the floor, polished wooden shaft standing up straight and proud.

"Norms help me, I'm being seduced by a fucking hammer." the god mused.

"Is that what you want?" Loki asked it "You want me to ride you like I do Thor?"

The hum he got in reply was electric and it sparked arousal in his stomach.

"Bozhe moĭ!" he muttered the Midgardian woman's words.

Taking a deep breath Loki stood from his chair and dropped to his knees in front of the great hammer.

“This is ridiculous,” He muttered to himself, but the closer he got to touching the hammer the more its magic trilled at him.

“What do you want?” Loki asked quietly, slightly hypnotized by the pull of Mjolnir’s magic.

The image of Loki rubbing his naked cock against the long handle as he wrapped both hands around the shaft and his cock and stroked them in time was planted firmly in his mind.

“Fuck,” Loki growled now suddenly turned on beyond all belief.

It might have had something to do with despoiling something so ‘good’ and ‘pure’ in the eyes of the Asgardians, he was a chaos maker after all, but something else, something more primal swelled up inside of him.

With a flick of his wrist Loki was naked, and hard.

The thought of Thor coming back very soon and walking in on this entertained him to great lengths.

Taking himself in his hand Loki moved to rub the very tip of his cock against Mjolnir’s handle, smearing the pre come against the polished wood.

Mjolnir trilled again, images of Loki losing himself and coming across the metal head of the hammer were sent to the frost giant in a hopes that he would comply.

Loki did not disappoint.

This was all too good to be true, a sexually active hammer seducing him? How could he resist?

Growing frustrated with his need Loki lined his cock up with the polished wood and wrapped both hands around them both before slowly working them in sync, much like he would with his and Thor’s cocks.

“Mmmm,” Loki purred lowly.

Mjolnir hummed filth to Loki again.

“Such a dirty mouth, where did you learn that I wonder, Dear Mjolnir,” He teased.

He sped up his hands, moving his hips in time with the stroking motion of his hands until he was panting, desperate for release.

“Ugh, yes,” He moaned, moving back away from the shaft so he could jerk himself to completion over the smooth metal of the head.

Pearly smears and ropes of come splattering in random patterns.

Loki smirked wickedly at his handiwork.

“I should leave you like this for when Thor returns,” he panted, eyeing the hammer in appreciation.

Mjolnir hummed and reminded him of the first image he sent of Loki riding Thor like a wanton whore.

“Oh I almost forgot,” He replied coyly.

“Shall I slick you up and ride you?” Loki asked out loud.

The image he got in return was of him fully impaled on the shaft, gasping and moaning like a slut, writhing on the polished wood as he sank up and down, his cock in hand jerking furiously.

“Well that’s a lovely idea,” Loki deadpanned his cock twitching back to life at the thought.

Gods he hoped Thor didn’t come back any time soon.

Loki reached for the oil he used and coated one of his long delicate fingers before slipping it inside of himself slowly, relishing in the slight burn of penetration.

Mjolnir hummed impatiently.

“Oh no, I plan on taking my time, but I know what will keep you occupied,” He grinned coating a second finger and adding it to the first as he moved forward on his knees to lick and suckle at the top of the polished wooden handle of the Great Hammer.

 

***

 

Thor was so terribly bored of this meeting with his father. Find a princess to wed this, have babies and chose an heir this. Blah blah. He longed to be back with Loki, spreading him open with his fingers and forcing him open even more with his cock.

“Thor if you’re not going to listen then what is the point of you even being here?” Odin questioned him.

“I’m sorry father, there is much on my mind,” He apologized.

“Very well, we shall continue this another time,” Odin declared and let him leave.

On his way back to his chambers Thor stopped off to pick up a few flowers, not that Loki was the flower type, but some of them he could use for his magics.

Thor loved Loki’s magic.

Upon arriving at his rooms he slipped inside locking the door and headed through the anti chamber to his bedrooms.

He stopped in the doorway, transfixed on the sight in front of him.

Loki was on all fours, one hand supporting his weight as the other worked what looked to be three fingers in and out of his body, preparing himself, as he licked what appear dot be his seed of the hammer before taking the wooden shaft in his mouth.

The sight should not have been as arousing as it was.

Thor moved back to the shadows to watch.

He deftly undid the lacings on his pants and, eased out his erection, stroking in time with Loki’s fingers.

Loki was blissfully unaware of his lover presence in the room and continued his work.

Mjolnir humming filthy, filthy things in his ear.

With a wet pop he let the tip of the handle fall from his mouth and pulled out his fingers, slicking oil over the polished wood.

Carefully he moved to straddle the hammer before lowering just enough so that the tip of the shaft penetrated his slick hole.

Loki moaned low in his throat before lowering himself further until he was seated fully, the cold metal head of the hammer chilling his cheeks.

“Fuck,” He swore, clenching around the handle a few times before moving up as far as his legs could take him in his kneeling position and then back down again. Delicious friction as the handle rubbed against his prostate.

Thor bit onto the knuckles of his free hand to stay silent, the hand working his cock speeding up at the sight of Loki impaling himself on his hammer.

What on earth possessed him to do this? He wondered, but he really didn’t care.

Loki soon found himself desperate for release. The handle would not yield like Thor’s cock and any angle he chose the solid wooden handle would stay true and upright. Loki threw his head back and moaned as he forcibly fucked himself up and down upon the hammer, on hand supporting himself the other working his cock.

His face and chest were covered in a delicious flush that told Thor he was close.

“Yes, Yes!” Loki chanted, hips working quickly.

“Fuck yes, Mjolnir,” He gasped.

The hammer trilled loudly at Loki, and his shaft seemed to grow thicker.

Loki hissed forcing himself down deeper and grinding the blunt head of the handle against his prostate until he came with a loud cry, seed spilling onto his hand and the floor.

He stayed like that for a few moments.

Face and chest read, hair all over the place, a thin sheen of sweat covering his body, his seed in a puddle before him and Mjolnir still deeply nestled in his ass.

Thor wiped his sticky hand on his shirt a he removed it.

“Well that was a wonderful show,” He called as he entered the room.

Loki froze, head slowly lifting to meet Thor’s eyes.

What a sight he must have made, he thought.

“I… I can explain,” Loki tried.

“I very much doubt it but I have no need of explanations from you,” Thor replied as he held out a hand to Loki to help him up and off Mjolnir.

Thor gave the hammer a quick glance, knowing he’ll never be able to concentrate whenever he was around the damn thing again.

Loki let Thor drag him to bed and nestle themselves under the covers.

Loki was at a loss for what to say.

“I liked watching you like that,” Thor said softly, honestly.

Loki gave him a small embarrassed smile.

“You should perform for me again,” He grinned.

Loki blushed deeply but nodded, settling in for a nap.

On the other side of the room Mjolnir waited.

 


End file.
